2010 sucks! Can it be over already?!

2010 seems to be a great year...for everyone but me. I hate this year with a passion and I wish it would just be over already. Yesterday I found out Erik might be coming back this weekend. I told myself not to get excited but I couldn't help it. There's so much going on I just want to be with him and be able to feel happy and reconnect with him. All the stress and crap that has been getting to me has made it really hard for us this trip. It seems like we are off and though I know we are good I just wish I could see him and feel close to him again. I'm so jealous of everyone right now. I feel like I don't have my shit together and I'm all alone in this stupid fucking state. I hate it here. I hate school. I hate learning about cows! I know I should suck it up and not be feeling so upset about this but all day I kept thinking "just get through it and you'll have a great weekend" I'll still have fun with my parents and everything but who knew one stupid hug could mean so much. This up and down emotional rollercoaster is started to get to me. I never even knew how long he's be able to be here. Hell, even an hour would have been great. I just want to see him and feel less alone here. It seems like this  year no matter what it is, even the smallest thing is ten times harder. When I fall I get hurt a lot more, when I have stress it hits me all over in every way possible, when I miss someone it feels  like I'm being stabbed in the heart. It's only April. I have another 8 months until this year is over. It started off so well to. Who knew having the best New Years Day of my life would start of the worst year of my life. The worst part of it all is feeling like no one is there to listen. Everyone is off doing their own thing and they are all busy with great amazing things. I sit here learning organic chem and cow shit and there's no one there. This really is killing me.